Oh, it's Christmas? Sorry, I forgot.

Yeah this year it just didn't feel like Christmas. I think it's just because I'm getting older (or maybe it was just the lack of snow) and you know, you feel less when you're older. It sucks big time... I miss being able to feel everything so much like when you were a kid, but I guess pretty soon I won't even feel the emptiness of it not being there. I wonder just how much you do feel when you get older. How much does it take to get a rush, to get an intense feeling? I want to actually care about some things in my life. Some people... "some people live inside a tiny little box/ they're preoccupied with just matchin their socks" as Big and Rich put it. They will be stuck their whole lives, not having any high plans for themselves besides being somewhere on time and having the right shoes on, blah blah blah. I want to actually do something, and actually experience the many things this life has to offer, which is a lot more than just whos turn it is to do dishes. So, those of you who want to, live in your box. Just please let me live, and let me have my christmas. Let me cry on my wedding day, and still be holding hands on my 60th wedding anniversary. Let me go to every Colin Farrell movie. Let me let the dishes build up for a couple of meals, edit my book, go skydiving. Let me watch my teams big game, let me kiss my boyfriend whenever I want to.

Let me. Your box is only built for one.

Love~
Monika